So I got my meds on Wednesday! So freaking excited. I LOVE my RE. He has a no PIO protocol and it is wonderful! I only have to stick myself with one little needle, which is for the Lupron! I know surros that not only have the Lupron but they have e2v shots! These are twice a week but big needles, as well as PIO which is just crazy big and oil so it goes in S L O W L Y, PLUS they also have the suppositories.. Just crazy really. I have pills! Estrace 3times daily and prometrium daily. The prometrium is a bit of a hassle and I am sooooo glad that I don't start that until I am home from Disney! It would have been hell having to not only FIND a bathroom but find it 3 times a day at the SAME time to insert the suppository.. Yeah not so much fun. LOL
I get to start my Lupron on Friday which is used to suppress my ovaries so I do not ovulate and not get my period. It can make you have headaches and hungry, so I am going to have to watch out for that. Drinking LOTS of water usually help though.
And so the sibling project OFFICIALLY begins! WOOHOO I am so nervous and trying not to be superstitious about this, but it worked first try the last time which was great, not to mention I had a very uneventful pregnancy as well. I am praying/hoping to have a repeat.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Our Journey to her at OneTrueMedia.com
I made this for my guys and figured that I better send it to them considering we are cycling for Coraline's sibling! Enjoy
Monday, August 30, 2010
What a freaking Monday!!
Title says it all. It has been a great/not so great Monday.
The great part first, it will not be in order but that's OK. So for any readers that want to look back in my blog for info certainly can, this is about my FIM Sunshine who is now a friend of mine. She is 17 weeks pregnant with TWINS!! This is such a great time for her. She is actually beginning to let it sink in that she is going to be a mom. She has a wonderful surro Kelly. Kelly is so great. I can honestly say that at first I was a bit jelly that she was her surro and I wasn't but then taht feeling has gone away. This is the way it was supposed to be. I was supposed to meet Sunshine, she has taught me so much these past 2 yrs. knowing her. And holy cow she posted pics on her blog so everyone could see HER babies growing! See this wonderful women Kelly that has a great twin bump! Ugh so freaking happy I could scream!
So OK on to myself..... I got the approval to move the days!!! YES! My calendar is final! PLUS I got the contract, which needs NOTHING changed!!!! We are just using the previous one with a few minor adjustments.. I am so happy that things are rollin along!! My transfer is on Oct. 11th!! I cannot wait.
The great part first, it will not be in order but that's OK. So for any readers that want to look back in my blog for info certainly can, this is about my FIM Sunshine who is now a friend of mine. She is 17 weeks pregnant with TWINS!! This is such a great time for her. She is actually beginning to let it sink in that she is going to be a mom. She has a wonderful surro Kelly. Kelly is so great. I can honestly say that at first I was a bit jelly that she was her surro and I wasn't but then taht feeling has gone away. This is the way it was supposed to be. I was supposed to meet Sunshine, she has taught me so much these past 2 yrs. knowing her. And holy cow she posted pics on her blog so everyone could see HER babies growing! See this wonderful women Kelly that has a great twin bump! Ugh so freaking happy I could scream!
So OK on to myself..... I got the approval to move the days!!! YES! My calendar is final! PLUS I got the contract, which needs NOTHING changed!!!! We are just using the previous one with a few minor adjustments.. I am so happy that things are rollin along!! My transfer is on Oct. 11th!! I cannot wait.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABIES!!!
So by the name of the post it is someones birthday! Well it's my twins!! I cannot believe that they are 4. It seems just like yesterday that I was in my OB's office for a regular appointment but low and behold I was contracting, I felt NOTHING, and when i say that I mean it no twinges or anything. So my OB tells me to goto the hospital to get monitored for a few more hrs and to stop any possible impending labor. I was 34.6 weeks pregnant. So I thought to myself as I was driving toward the hospital that I don't even have my bag packed yet..
I did not have one packed because my pregnancy was going so great that I just felt that I would wait till 36 weeks to pack one.
So instead of going straight to the hospital I made a detour home to pack a small bag. So I get home and am in my room rushing around to get things in order and I stop to look at a picture that is on my dresser, I do not keep pictures on my dresser they are always down stairs in the living room, anyway the picture was of my hubbys father, who had already passed away, I thought it was even stranger though cause this picture WAS NOT on my dresser when I left for my appointment AND it was HIS BIRTHDAY as well. So I pick it up and talk to him as though he is there and say " Well Papa I sure hope my instincts are wring but I think you may just have to share your birthday with these 2" I then had an overwhelming feeling that he was there and telling me yes. Long story short Taylor & Moriah were born on his birthday! I did then and still do think that this was his plan all along..lol
So my twins are 4. Crazy thought for me because it seems like yesterday they were infants. I miss that smell, the smell of a baby, on their neck. I have always LOVED that smell. I miss begin able to hold and cuddle them, to watch them sleep. See their faces light up when you pick them up, to see them looking around to a world un- explored, full of possibilities. It is not like the twins are grown, but they depend on me less, and less and I can say that I truly miss that true dependency that once had.
I truly understand where parents come from when they say that "They will always be my baby" To me this means that they will always be my last. My last chance to breath in their youth, their fresh outlook on life. To experience their firsts. Makes me sad but at the same time I am over joyed that they are here, happy and healthy.
I did not have one packed because my pregnancy was going so great that I just felt that I would wait till 36 weeks to pack one.
So instead of going straight to the hospital I made a detour home to pack a small bag. So I get home and am in my room rushing around to get things in order and I stop to look at a picture that is on my dresser, I do not keep pictures on my dresser they are always down stairs in the living room, anyway the picture was of my hubbys father, who had already passed away, I thought it was even stranger though cause this picture WAS NOT on my dresser when I left for my appointment AND it was HIS BIRTHDAY as well. So I pick it up and talk to him as though he is there and say " Well Papa I sure hope my instincts are wring but I think you may just have to share your birthday with these 2" I then had an overwhelming feeling that he was there and telling me yes. Long story short Taylor & Moriah were born on his birthday! I did then and still do think that this was his plan all along..lol
So my twins are 4. Crazy thought for me because it seems like yesterday they were infants. I miss that smell, the smell of a baby, on their neck. I have always LOVED that smell. I miss begin able to hold and cuddle them, to watch them sleep. See their faces light up when you pick them up, to see them looking around to a world un- explored, full of possibilities. It is not like the twins are grown, but they depend on me less, and less and I can say that I truly miss that true dependency that once had.
I truly understand where parents come from when they say that "They will always be my baby" To me this means that they will always be my last. My last chance to breath in their youth, their fresh outlook on life. To experience their firsts. Makes me sad but at the same time I am over joyed that they are here, happy and healthy.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
YAY!! I have followers!
LOL... I just wanted to say a HUGE thanks so my 2 followers and for my comment! I have been writing on this blog for just about 2 yrs. and this is the first time I feel like actually writing. I hope I don't disappoint..
So lets see whats going on now.. lets start with my f-up of a NC ( nurse coordinator) also known at my clinic as the Donor Coordinator. Don't get me wrong she is sweet and all but sweet does NOT get shit done. She is the 2rd one that my IF's and I have dealt with.. First was Tiffany, LOVED her she was the BEST and she was my NC last time I even bought her an extravagant bouquet of flowers and I was soooo excited to get to work with her again, but she is gone because she had a beautiful baby and is taking care of him. So on to the next one Heather! She started out great, she asked me what days I was not available and I let her know via email Sept 26th - Oct. 5th because that was our BIG Disney World trip. So she said fine no problems and to just let her know when my cycle started. Well my cycle started on the 21st, no problems there I thought it would be here between the 22nd-25th so i was right on track. I emailed Heather on Saturday and no word almost ALL day on Monday and that scared me because Monday was my day 3 and I knew I needed to get my baseline blood work done. Well the NEW NC called me at 3:30 Denver time which is 5:30 DC time so I knew she had probably forgot about me, well she told me to come in anytime from 7:30am - 9:30am, then I told her umm I am in Denver so I will go into my monitoring clinic, she then says Oh OK then you do that. I ask her if SHE wants ME to call them to schedule an appointment. Of course she shay yes. So I just deal and take it for what it s worth and call my clinic here, well guess what? She NEVER faxed over the orders to them AND they have to have that first, but even better they also HAVE to have a credit card on file before I can come in as well. '
I then try to call the DC clinic and the phones of course are off, so I leave a message AND send her a few emails. I of course have to call my IF to let him know what is going on and he is a bit unsettled because this new NC used to be in billing and she does not really know ( or at least she is showing us she dosen't know) what she is doing. OK fast forward to Tuesday.
Well it does not start out so promising. Remember I am 2 hrs behind DC so the NC is in the clinic and could have handled the 2 things that she needed to, that I told her needed to be taken care of BEFORE I could even schedule my appt. You think it was done?? NOPE. So I had to get on the phone and call around, I finally got her to fax the orders over but she still has not handled the credit card issue. I mean seriously?? So MY clinic out here calls me to see what the hold up is and then Lori says she will call the DC clinic to get it sorted and not to worry. Lets put it this way she speaks with the NC, NC tells her she will call her back in 10 min. well 20 min later and NO CALL. So I call MY IF and tell him, he calls MY clinic and gives them a CC and literally at 9am I am told to be there by 930am... Good thing I was ALREADY on my way to the clinic. UGH so annoying that I have to keep on track of these things.
Oh and she still messes up the calendar! She has on there for me to go in and get the ONE and only ultrasound and blood work on October 4th! WTF?? Did you NOT read any of Heather's emails? i am out of town. So I had to call and leave another message with her. I am NOT calling to tell my IF what is going on because it is just going to stress him out and he does NOT need the added stress.. So now I get to play phone tag again! Good thing I don't work cause if I did I would really be ready to kill this women!
So lets see whats going on now.. lets start with my f-up of a NC ( nurse coordinator) also known at my clinic as the Donor Coordinator. Don't get me wrong she is sweet and all but sweet does NOT get shit done. She is the 2rd one that my IF's and I have dealt with.. First was Tiffany, LOVED her she was the BEST and she was my NC last time I even bought her an extravagant bouquet of flowers and I was soooo excited to get to work with her again, but she is gone because she had a beautiful baby and is taking care of him. So on to the next one Heather! She started out great, she asked me what days I was not available and I let her know via email Sept 26th - Oct. 5th because that was our BIG Disney World trip. So she said fine no problems and to just let her know when my cycle started. Well my cycle started on the 21st, no problems there I thought it would be here between the 22nd-25th so i was right on track. I emailed Heather on Saturday and no word almost ALL day on Monday and that scared me because Monday was my day 3 and I knew I needed to get my baseline blood work done. Well the NEW NC called me at 3:30 Denver time which is 5:30 DC time so I knew she had probably forgot about me, well she told me to come in anytime from 7:30am - 9:30am, then I told her umm I am in Denver so I will go into my monitoring clinic, she then says Oh OK then you do that. I ask her if SHE wants ME to call them to schedule an appointment. Of course she shay yes. So I just deal and take it for what it s worth and call my clinic here, well guess what? She NEVER faxed over the orders to them AND they have to have that first, but even better they also HAVE to have a credit card on file before I can come in as well. '
I then try to call the DC clinic and the phones of course are off, so I leave a message AND send her a few emails. I of course have to call my IF to let him know what is going on and he is a bit unsettled because this new NC used to be in billing and she does not really know ( or at least she is showing us she dosen't know) what she is doing. OK fast forward to Tuesday.
Well it does not start out so promising. Remember I am 2 hrs behind DC so the NC is in the clinic and could have handled the 2 things that she needed to, that I told her needed to be taken care of BEFORE I could even schedule my appt. You think it was done?? NOPE. So I had to get on the phone and call around, I finally got her to fax the orders over but she still has not handled the credit card issue. I mean seriously?? So MY clinic out here calls me to see what the hold up is and then Lori says she will call the DC clinic to get it sorted and not to worry. Lets put it this way she speaks with the NC, NC tells her she will call her back in 10 min. well 20 min later and NO CALL. So I call MY IF and tell him, he calls MY clinic and gives them a CC and literally at 9am I am told to be there by 930am... Good thing I was ALREADY on my way to the clinic. UGH so annoying that I have to keep on track of these things.
Oh and she still messes up the calendar! She has on there for me to go in and get the ONE and only ultrasound and blood work on October 4th! WTF?? Did you NOT read any of Heather's emails? i am out of town. So I had to call and leave another message with her. I am NOT calling to tell my IF what is going on because it is just going to stress him out and he does NOT need the added stress.. So now I get to play phone tag again! Good thing I don't work cause if I did I would really be ready to kill this women!
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
NO SUPPORT...
Well given the title it really says it all. I will have NO support for my next journey. And to think I thought that I had the most supportive family ever. Well guess not. I just found out that my MIL thought that we ( DH) and I should have given her some of my comp money. That my DH "should" have wanted to give it to her.. Are you serious??? WOW is all I can say. And now she is against my doing this again which in turn means she will not watch the girls at all. Now I have to find a babysitter/nanny that I can trust my girls with, never mind that it will cost the guys more money, ugh. I am so tired to her yoyo support. Never mind that now I feel I will have to deal with my DH's lack of support because of his mother. I am so upset it is crazy.. I want this journey to be great and it is sooooo not starting out that way...Great
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Another journey??
So I have been getting all my paperwork in order and have had my testing done. I am happy to say that all is well and I am healthy!! I was nervous about my PAP because of my scare back in 08 and I think I always will be, BUT it came back normal and fine. My agency is THE BEST. My coordinator D called and said that she has a couple that I might be interested in. I got their profile and was very happy because they seem like really down to earth great people. This time they are a traditional couple so that is a little scary. The IM is only 36 and has never been pregnant. I say that it scares me because I know with IF's they go into this KNOWING that they can never be pregnant and with an IM I do not know how she will react. What if we have a failed cycle ( which is a very high probability) what if I mis-carry, what if she freaks out cause I am pregnant. The likely hood of an IM pulling away and not having any contact after the pregnancy is a TON higher than with IF's and I am already in that world and I do not like it one bit. I HATE feeling like I have to beg for an update or a picture. It would suck to have to go through that again.
So they have my profile and have 2 days to say if they want to do a phone interview. BUT it will be longer than that because of the holiday weekend, which stinks but at the same time won't be too bad since its a fun weekend and busy. I am a lot more calm this go around, still have butterflies but not as bad. I haven't told anyone about the profile and what I think about my possible match. My hubby has asked a few questions here and there but he knows how this goes and won't be too concerned till I tell him that they want to talk and move forward. That's when ALL the questions begin..lol.
Just a little update on M... Her surro is 9 weeks and doing great. I think that this pregnancy will go just fine and in 7 months M will have her babies in her arms. I can tell by M's posts that she is way more calm about this cycle and has been since the beginning. So the next u/s is next Wednesday.
On another note. I haven't heard from my IF's in a few weeks. I have never received any type of real pictures, just camera phone quick shots. I know they did birth announcements and do you think I got one? NOPE. I know that I am not entitled to any contact at all and did not go into this to be BFF's with my IF's but damn. I just feel like a piece of chewed gum that got spit out. All used up and not needed and never given a second thought after I am spit out. I know that they have to think of me when they see their daughter but is it REALLY so hard to put forth an ounce of effort? I also have NOT told them that I am moving on, the last real conversations was me telling them and really opening myself up to them about how I wanted for us to try and be in contact more and how I felt. We talked and said we wanted to work together for a sibling journey but I know now that it is NOT possible. I feel bad somewhat cause I do think it will be hard for them to match with another surro. I know for a fact that I am a VERY open minded person and to find others like me is gong to be hard. I still have the want and desire to carry Caroline's sibling but again I have to think of ME and what I want out of this next journey. I cannot just think about my IP's, yes we all want the same thing in the end for them to be parents but at the same time is it right for me to compromise what *I* need/want? No and i will not. No I cannot force a relationship to be built but at the same time I can certainly move forward with another couple that would also like to at least TRY to build one with me.
So they have my profile and have 2 days to say if they want to do a phone interview. BUT it will be longer than that because of the holiday weekend, which stinks but at the same time won't be too bad since its a fun weekend and busy. I am a lot more calm this go around, still have butterflies but not as bad. I haven't told anyone about the profile and what I think about my possible match. My hubby has asked a few questions here and there but he knows how this goes and won't be too concerned till I tell him that they want to talk and move forward. That's when ALL the questions begin..lol.
Just a little update on M... Her surro is 9 weeks and doing great. I think that this pregnancy will go just fine and in 7 months M will have her babies in her arms. I can tell by M's posts that she is way more calm about this cycle and has been since the beginning. So the next u/s is next Wednesday.
On another note. I haven't heard from my IF's in a few weeks. I have never received any type of real pictures, just camera phone quick shots. I know they did birth announcements and do you think I got one? NOPE. I know that I am not entitled to any contact at all and did not go into this to be BFF's with my IF's but damn. I just feel like a piece of chewed gum that got spit out. All used up and not needed and never given a second thought after I am spit out. I know that they have to think of me when they see their daughter but is it REALLY so hard to put forth an ounce of effort? I also have NOT told them that I am moving on, the last real conversations was me telling them and really opening myself up to them about how I wanted for us to try and be in contact more and how I felt. We talked and said we wanted to work together for a sibling journey but I know now that it is NOT possible. I feel bad somewhat cause I do think it will be hard for them to match with another surro. I know for a fact that I am a VERY open minded person and to find others like me is gong to be hard. I still have the want and desire to carry Caroline's sibling but again I have to think of ME and what I want out of this next journey. I cannot just think about my IP's, yes we all want the same thing in the end for them to be parents but at the same time is it right for me to compromise what *I* need/want? No and i will not. No I cannot force a relationship to be built but at the same time I can certainly move forward with another couple that would also like to at least TRY to build one with me.
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